: I've spent the past 5 years doing lifestyle design experiments, trying to systematize and build habits to minimize the idiosyncrasies and insecurities that arise from my intellect. I've done a pretty good job of beating the smart people problems. I put together a Lifestyle Plan flowchart
which visually breaks it down, it's a peak into some of the wacky, unconventionally yet seriously effective lifestyle strategies that empower the pretty awesome life
I have, get it here
Society puts smart people on quite a lofty pedestal but there's some real downsides to being highly intelligent. You're on this website because you were either born a smart person (which as you will see by the end of this article is actually not such a lucky roll of the genetic dice) or on your way to becoming a very smart person. Whether you're part of the club already or still (like me!) paying your dues there's some things that really suck about being smart.
By the End of this Article...
You will understand some of the vexing problems that you have, up to this point in your life, failed to beat with your smarts and intellectual resources. For each problem we identify solutions; both actionable behaviors to change and deeper mindsets to internalize.
Do you know anyone that when you talk to them you feel like a young Jedi getting advice advice from Yoda? I do. His name is Dr. Mark Ashton Smith. Dr. Smith runs a cognitive psychology lab at the University of Cyprus, is a lecturer at Cambridge University and is the creator of the brain training software Dual N-Back Pro. He's one of the most insightful, well spoken and charming people I know. We had a +1 hour conversation about smart people problems in Podcast #26, give it a download!
Getting Laid Less
Highly intelligent people usually have less sex, especially when they are younger. I totally used too fit into this stereotype...
I lost my virginity to spy. Here's the story...
At age 20 I had a great social life and lots of friends who were girls but I was a virgin and I badly wanted to change that. I met her on the dancefloor at a foam party (classy... I know!). She had an exotic, uhm, black woman's name.
The girl I met a midst the suds aggressively thrust me into her social group. We started going out together once or twice a week, as friends. One night we jokingly agreed to be each other's PLAN B in case we didn't hook up with strangers at the party we were going too (again, classy, I know!). Before I dropped her off I announced that I needed a glass of water from her apartment. I left about 3 hours later devirginized. When we had first met she mentioned she had studied criminal justice. I found out a year later that her secretarial office job was a cover for her job as spy. She worked for the State of Colorado and was investigating her employer for financial fraud. As she grew to trust me she confided various details of her undercover assignments. Eventually she quit after witnessing a recently deceased coworker - there's no way I would share this via my blog if she was still a spy. She was a good friend.
Unfortunately the stereotype of the sexually frustrated nerd who hasn't been laid in 6 months is pretty accurate, especially in younger people as documented in a Journal of Adolescent Health paper. I'm not just talking about smart guys either, there's is a strong correlation between lower birthrate and women of higher education and IQ. Smart people's tendency to over analyze probably has a lot to do with this problem, we are more often doing cost-benefit analysis, second guessing decisions and trying to make predictions about our future relationships when we should probably be thinking with our loins instead of our neocortexes.
On the Bright Side: General Survey Data from the United States suggests that richer, more educated people enjoy sex more.
The Solution: The activities that get you laid; dating, courtship and lovemaking really are skill sets that need to be developed with study, coaching, practice and repetition. Three really excellent, ethical resources I've found for these areas are the The Art of Charm Podcast and Daygame. A Mindmiester flowchart is a great tool for purposeful lifestyle design.
Read more ...