How I met the love of my life…

During this historically unprecedented global pandemic (that’s putting all our social lives on lockdown) I’m really thankful that I’m married!

My wife makes self-quarantine pretty awesome…
We’ve been doing a lot of fun roleplaying during our “date nights” at home.
We have great intellectual discussions.
We’re constantly laughing and joking about something.
She’s helped me with my food prepping.
We read books together.
We do some biohacking stuff together.

Single people, those living alone or with roommates that they barely know have my sympathy at this time, it must suck! I know that the enforced isolation really would have gotten to me were I still single despite all the social networking tools and VOIP apps along with all the mental health, and “draw happiness from within” lifehacks that I employ. Meeting the love of my life wouldn’t have happened without my Secret Society Infiltration strategy for “networking” which I describe in my book.

I met her at a nightclub, which isn’t all that special but funnily enough, it was thanks to a wingman who I’d met through a local pickup artist group. As a digital nomad dude, moving to different cities or countries every few months the way that I would NOT waste time meeting people and making new friends as a foreigner in foreign lands was to connect to high-affinity local networks. If you just meet random people in bars or via social networking websites you will make friends but they will be pretty shallow friendships. If you focus on high-affinity groups with profound shared values you get a whole lot more meaningful friendships out of the leisure time you spend socializing and you filter out the people who frankly are not worth your time to get to know. Real Social Dynamics’ local pickup artist groups are just such a high-affinity venue for cultivating meaningful friendships. The fact that I got married to a great woman thanks to this community should clear up any stereotypes you might have about pickup artists being a bunch of sleezebags that only hook up with drunk skanky club girls. You might think that pickup artists wouldn’t be in a hurry to introduce some guy that had just arrived in their country to the girls they know (and are presumably trying to hook up with) but in my experience, they have often been very generous about making just the kinds of introductions that I wanted.

The Pickup Artist community might be irrelevant to you but the principle can be adapted for your values and interests. If you want “networking” and socializing to ROI for you (as it has for me) identify Secret Societies that you share deep values with, focus your time on connecting with them as opposed to random people at parties or people you know from college and you’ll experience all this marvelous (and potentially romantic) serendipity in your life.

Hopefully, the global pandemic has taught us all to just take life a little more seriously — to cut out the junk food, the junk entertainment, and the junk people. There are going to be more pandemics and catastrophes, we’re in an era of global accelerating entropy, and achieving interpersonal social antifragility — finding or building a tribe of people who would have you back in a fight — is getting more and more important. I’ve known A LOT of dynamic, intelligent, ambitious young people who were too cool for monogamy (I’ve been one of those people!), hopefully, the past few months have taught them that there’s real value in having an irreplaceable, committed life partner. Soon our governments are going to ease social distancing enforcement and the opportunity is going to reopen to get out there and rub shoulders with those in a Secret Society that fits you.

Does a salsa dancing or a travel meetup group qualify as a “Secret Society”?

Not really.

What about a group of people who are really into psychedelics?

Maybe… Secret Societies are typically concerned with deeper existential questions. In chapter 5 of my book, I delve a lot deeper into this concept and its practical applications. Infiltrating a Secret Society isn’t often as simple as joining a Facebook group, it might entail devoting some time and effort and it certainly entails getting out of your house. When life seems to go back to normal in the coming weeks or months, I urge you to be more intentional with your social life, it might really pay off.